More Celebrations

Well, a few more birthdays. Todd will join me at 44 and Dottie will be 90. I can't imagine how much life will change in another 45 years for me. Todd will join me at the spa. I love the spa. We get to be sort of alone and be totally relaxed. I am looking forward to the time. We have been very much into the children celebrations with Christmas and Stephanie's birthday. Time to do a little adult time. We should all celebrate. Not just other people's milestones, but our own. We should take a little time to toot our horns and focus on us. It is important. I am trying to remember.

Hit and Miss

Well, Thursday we were to have a big snow and today we were supposed to have 3 or 4 inches. We almost canceled Stephanie's lunch with the Grandparents today because we were worried they would get in bad weather on the way back. Well, of course it stopped snowing 4 hours later and no accumulation. Cold but very dry. I have always said I wish I could have a job where I could be wrong this often.

But our life predictions are no closer sometimes. I don't know that any of us hit the mark. As I look at Stephanie, now 13, I wonder what her future will be. I never thought she would be text messaging and all social. When she was born they didn't text message. I hope that she builds her own future and makes all her predictions come true.

Parties and Preparations

My baby is turning 13 years old. I am amazed and all that has passed and all that has changed. I look at pictures and can't comprehend how much a child can grow in just twelve months. I can't believe how much older I look. We are planning a big boy/girl bash at a laser tag facility. She is very happy. Sitting in her room calling out huge vocabulary worlds, I now know she can't get anywhere fast in life for responding to all those text messages. Truly, the world of a teenager has moved far beyond what we experienced.
As my grandmother of almost 90 talks about parties at the local college and boys being fresh and forward, my baby is entering a world of low rise jeans, sexually explicit song lyrics and instant communication. Certainly much is expected of our children today. They have to be much smarter about everything and can almost never relax about going out ongoing on-line. All the dangers of yesteryear can enter your home unknowingly via a modem.
Oh, how I wish I could take her back to the years of PBS and car seats. A time when I was her world so she would always be safe. As I take a back seat I can't help but to worry that I haven't done enough to prepare her. I sure hope I am wrong. God bless her and keep her.

And the tide turns

Well, in a week a lot can change. My grandmother was discharged. She did not qualify for any assistance but she will be a handful for my Mom. My Mom doesn't have an adequate support system in place for this. There are so many people caring for older family members but the resources are just not there. People who spend there money raising their families, don't always have enough left over to care for themselves in old age. Since this has been a problem for the last decade, would have thought more would have been done.

On the Road Again.

Well, we seem to be putting a groove in I 85. All December and now January we have been very involved in family events. People are going both directions for sure, with our family coming here and we certainly are going there as well. With our plans for the rest of the Month, I see more of it coming. I don't think we have gone more than three days without seeing one of our out of town family members. I spent some time with my grandmother this week and my mom. She is not doing better and my mom has had it hard. But tomorrow we are going to celebrate another birthday. I think when something bad happens to love ones, you refocus and take them less for granted. Well, since we are not just thinking of ourselves and our weekend breaks, we are all spending more time together. We are lucky after all to have somewhere to go and someone to see.

The End

My grandmother is ill. She has always been special. She will be 90 in February and we were planning a big party. She has been failing in physical health but pretty sharp. Until last weekend. She started behaving strangely. We thought she had mismanaged her medicine and were starting to deal with that. She was admitted to the hospital to be checked out and now she is very disoriented and having some hallucinations. The doctors don't know why. I am not ready for her to leave us. I am not ready not to be able to call her and chat. What bothers me now is the missed opportunities for whatever reason that I let pass in the last few years. We never know how quickly the end will come for a relationship. We simply have to make time for what matters... and who matters.